November 25, 2014

Poet Tree, Part Two

Today, I got a surprise phone call from London Ontario's Urban Forester, Ivan Listar:

He told me that my name and number had been passed on:  "I don't know why I'm calling; how can I help you?"  

I asked him if he had read Saturday's paper.  He had not.  of course he hadn't...
I quickly explained about the poet tree and the ongoing dispute, and sent him the link to the Free Press piece (LFP - Nov 21, 2014).  I told him that I would never intentionally injure a tree, and that I had planted three quarters of a million trees when I was in my early twenties.  

And then I went for it:  "I am hoping that the city will consider making an exception to the Boulevard Tree Protection bylaw which stipulates, "no person shall attach any object or thing to a tree upon a boulevard without written permission from the General Manager".

Ivan seemed amused - he liked Spike Milligan's A Silly Poem - and I think he understood my intentions.  He promised to speak to some of his City Hall peeps.  I hope that the city can reach a quick decision (within 3 months).  I want the Poet Tree to continue to spread literary love in its current incarnation.

Because I am a Farcebook addict, I had to share the poet tree saga with my friends.  

I got a call from Ivan L (head arborist - City of London) today. He has asked the General Manager - John B - to make an exception for my Poet Tree. Waiting with bated breath. Maple still there's still a chance; I leaf it in John's hands.
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Are you barking with laughter?  I love my punny friends. xoxox

I will post anew when I find out the city's decision.

Oh and before I sign off, I should mention that the ubertalented Gord Harrison, seen below, has offered to help me with a solution if the city does not.

  Gord calls this shot "at one with the tree".  :-)

He thought that the poetry frame could go on a post:

Of course I won't be able to call it my POET TREE any longer, because it will be on a damn post.  So I will call it PoPo (short for poetry post, natch).

I am still hoping that the city comes to its senses and grants me a reprieve / exception.  PoPo, while entertaining, doesn't do it for me.

Other solutions, most of which strike me as ridiculous:
  • a metal stand that wraps around the tree, embracing it in true tree-hugger style
  • nylon bands that ratchet tightly and attach the frame to the tree
  • a leather belt from the Goodwill that cinches the frame to the tree's waist 
  • that I hold court on the sidewalk and spout poetry to the masses (seriously considering this one, obviously)
  • that I share the poetry in a blog
  • that I hang the frame from a branch in the tree
  • and my absolute favourite:  that I nail it to the fence of my favourite neighbour 

Ha ha hahahhah!

Green froth would spew from my nabe's mouth and he would eventually combust if I nailed my poetry to his fence.

I should do it.


I need to write a part three because the Poet Tree is back up!  YaY!  Look for that on May 29th, 2015

Optional Musical pairing:  a fine ditty by Jamiroquai

Or if you don't like Jamiroquai and his giant hats, try some Jacksoul:

Part one, see here: