Fresh on the heels of my late night Grammy watching, I rose this morning to hear the deejay confirm what I hoped not to hear: "all school buses in London Middlesex are canceled". Ai! Kids would be stoked; me not so much. I let them sleep in because really, why WOULD I wake them? I am definitely CUCKABONGA, but not THAT CUCKABONGA.
It is 10:21 am and I have decided to blog about the day.
Kids are homeschooling (each other - hahahaahahha!) at the kitchen table and Gwen just whined and bitched at her brother, who presumably hit or kicked her. Can you tell that I am concerned? I should be, actually. A week ago, Gwenzilla gave Nathanimal a "Level 10" smackdown that saw us hanging at The Children's Hospital for two hours, while N received 3 stitches above his right ear.
But for now, I'll let them fight in peace. :-)
My grand plans for the day, before I learned all buses were canceled, were to finish two short stories, go to the gym, grocery shop, make some soup, do some laundry, and shovel some snow. Now I've got the kiddos to help me with all this. And so, I have decided to chronicle our day, for fun. And because I know that whatever we do, it will be awesome and EVERYONE needs to hear about it. Heh heh. This is what I've accomplished so far, after rising at 6:15:
put in a load of laundry - so fun, cleaned my bedroom floor (last night, while I watched Beyonce dirty dance with Jay-Z, Gwen laid out 8 fashionista outfits from my closet at the foot of my bed for me to choose from this morning. grrrrrrr. Here's a pic of some of the ensembles. Love that purple orange combo, G!)
ate breakfast (coffee, rye toast with cinnamon honey and apple), read newspaper, checked email and Farcebook. I know. SO INTERESTING.
cleaned up breakfast dishes, worked on short story for very brief period, finished cutting out quilt templates and selected fabrics. This is what I'm making, btw:
This is a modern version of a clamshell quilt that I am in love with. I want to marry it! The clamshell is a traditional pattern and can look very fussy, depending one one's choice of fabrics. The tone-on-tone tans and funky pops of colour definitely make this version very fresh and modern. I will be making my own version with greys, purples and pale greens. I have posted a pic of some of my fabrics below.
image from craftsy.com
Looks quite ugly now, but trust me, it will be magnifique. I am rethinking that pink and grey in the lower right though.
In case you are wondering how I am managing to blog, it's currently "recess" :-). Now let me continue that list:
kids got up, they got dressed and fed themselves. I oversaw their efforts while tidying up the kitchen and dining room tables so that I could put them to work.
dumped another load of laundry on bed, hand washed lingerie (For those of you rolling your eyes at me, I am not trying to sound "all Martha", btw. I really did do this. It took 5 mins, tops. I put my linge in to soak earlier in the morning, and then all I had to do was swish it around, give it a bit of a scrub, rinse, wring and hang to dry). Snap.
forced children to "work" at table (they both have books with math and English lessons).
Nathaniel helped Gwen with reading. I decided that we would bake bread as part of our snow day. Again, if you are thinking that I am some uberorganized hausfrau, I can assure you that I am not. Can you hear me swear as I take this picture?
yelled at children to FOCUS. HOCUS POCUS FOCUS!!!!! while I looked for bread recipe. Found it!
made bread dough with N's assistance. Yes, we washed our hands. Yes, I am going to attempt to bake a baguette. Yes, I am really am loco.
Kids each kneaded dough for 6 minutes. They seemed to like this. I did not like flour all over my floor and counter, but I bit my tongue and sucked it up.
doesn't this look delightful?
bread before first rise
Cleaned up floor and counter. Complained loudly while doing so.
at 9:54am, I decided to write this blog and wrote down all the shit that I'd already done
handwashed silk blouse that has been sitting in laundry room waiting to be washed since New Year's Eve. Lamented vomit stain. KIDDING. Just wanted a reaction. As if I would vomit on NY's eve. As if I would EVER vomit on myself.
It is now 10:49. I am giving myself (the rest of recess) another 10 - 15 mins to blog.
12:31pm - more of list.
made lunch for evil offspring - Montreal style bagels with cream cheese and apples. Kids tried to sneak down to basement to veg in front of screens while I was in the loo. I screamed mightily when they came up.
forced children into snow pants. Went outside and shoveled, and entertained self and dog.
Nathanimal and Django. Nath had to "take him down" after he let him off-leash in spite of repeated warnings from me not to do so.
One of Django's tricks that I hate. It's called "HUG". Nath taught him this wretched trick, which basically amounts to the overlarge 80 pound poodle jumping on people. He knows better to try this with me or most adults, but if you're a kid, look out!
And still more of my list:
shaped loaves and got them ready to go into oven
wow, they almost look like an adult, as opposed to a toddler, made them
you are supposed to spray the loaves every 5 minutes with water so that they get a hard crust.
Seriously? And so that's what I did, after making myself a cup of chai.
Sighed.
I also learned that because French bread has no oil in it (oil is a preservative), that is why your baguette is stale the next day. Who knew?
And then I cheered, because this is what they looked like, after all that spraying and baking:
Oh mon dieu! C'est parfait!!!!
I can't wait to try these! I think they're my best effort to date. Yay, me!
Okay, I'm done with my list, let's face it, no one wants to hear more and it's time for me to veg. Have a great rest of snow day, peeps!
It is September and I haven't written anything about my Nacel experience. It be time, people. Nacel Canada is a not for profit organization that pairs international students with hosts, "promoting international understanding and language education... enhancing cultural and linguistic awareness". So in a nutshell, London and area families host one or more French students (from France, not Quebec) for a period of 3 or 4 weeks.
Payment is $600 for four weeks. This is not a money-making venture. A three week stay pays $450. You are expected to pay for all the student's meals (includes dining in restaurants) and incidentals. The student pays his/her own admission to places like Canada's Wonderland. I found that with all the sightseeing we did, we spent a LOT more than $600; however, I was perfectly happy to do so.
You can click here to read a more detailed account of the first half of this story. If you don't want to read the first part because you are lazy, disinterested and/or pressed for time, here's what you need to know: In July, Nacel's program administrator, Gayle, called me and inquired about the possibility of us hosting a student for a month. She had an emergency situation and was desperate. I stepped in because I like to play the heroine. :-)
Clémence, a seventeen year old girl from Nantes, arrived on July the 4th. Before we met, I did worry that she might be a big French freak! My concerns were completely unfounded. She was friendly, had a good sense of humour and she quickly made herself at home. By the "making herself at home" part, I mean that when I told her I didn't make breakfast for my children, and lunch was often serve yourself, she wasn't shy about getting acquainted with the kitchen. I suppose that if you are hungry (and every day there exists a very good possibility of experiencing said hunger) you will seek out food. At 17, you should be able to fix up some food for yourself.
C was a typical teenager:
she was attached to her tablet by umbilical cord
she had a deep and abiding love of potato chips and "Starbuck" (she couldn't say it with the 's'!).
she liked to sleep and hang out in her room
She also did a fair bit of jogging; I am uncertain whether that is typical of the youth of today.
I was supposed to homeschool C but she would have none of it. Her words: "I didn't sign up for that".
Okayyyyyyyyy.
I didn't think that it was my job to sit her at our dining room table and force her to read the newspaper and discuss current events, especially as her English was already almost parfait, much better than my French. And so, my homeschooling efforts were more surreptitious: we talked a lot, played board games (Rummikub, Cartagena and Rummoli), we cooked together (muffins - I have posted two recipes below), we went for walks and hung out. These are all excellent ways to learn a language. We also went on a bike ride, but I couldn't get her into the pool (too cold!) or get her on White Water Canyon (her hair!) at Canada's Wonderland.
Before you read about all the fun things we did while C was here, I should let you know that we hosted another student in August, who was also in an "emergency" situation. What is with Nacel and all of these emergency situations? The second student was fifteen years old, also from France (Toulouse) and had been staying in London with a family of 5. Both parents worked and the children were cared for by a nanny, who had her own newborn to look after in addition to the others. Without going into too much detail, no outings and an army of small children who require care do not make for a fun trip.
Jeanne fit in to our family amazingly well. She was quiet, helpful, considerate and very good-natured. She and Gwenny, my seven-year-old daughter, loved doing each other's hair and cuddling. They were very cute together.
By no means an exhaustive list, here's what we did over the course of July and August:
Sunfest
Sunfest is an annual summer festival held in Victoria Park that promotes music, dance and visual arts. The day we attended was bloody hot. Clémence seemed to enjoy the tunes and the artisans. My kids? Not so much. Their highlight was hanging out with a large group of pierced, tattooed and grubby hippies in a drumming circle. Gwen hula hooped and Nathaniel slack-lined. The odour of patchouli was overwhelming. One girl's shirt read Fuck Malls. I was glad that Gwen couldn't read.
Cottaging near Parry Sound
My awesome neighbours, Nic and Caitie, invited us up to their heavenly spot on McKellar Lake. We swam, fished, feasted on the fish we caught, played games, toured Parry Sound, read mags and thoroughly enjoyed Canadian cottage life.
Nic and Nathaniel, and a little fish-wrangling. This is one of Nathaniel's big catches that we later dined on, I think.
view from the Parry Sound water tower
top of the water tower - it was windy!
Self portrait
Sunset and thin slice of moon, ahhhhhhh...
Grand Bend
My sister-in-law and her family hosted our student for three days at their cottage. GB is a teenager's paradise: there is a trashy and expensive strip with shops selling beachwear and souvenirs, and divey bars and restaurants all frequented by the scantily clad youth of today. I think Clémence enjoyed it.
Here we are enjoying a lobster boil (mini potatoes, shrimp, chorizo, lobster and corn) in honour of my niece's birthday.
Paul and the giant pot
I annoyed and disgusted everyone at the party by discussing how the lobsters are boiled alive. I think it's important to acknowledge how your food gets to the table and how it is prepared. This doesn't always make me a popular person, but I can't help myself. So while I am not comfortable dunking a live lobster in a pot of boiling water, I did eat the cooked lobster. I guess that makes me a hypocrite. It seems to me that there must be a more humane way of killing lobsters than by boiling them to death. As I have never hosted my own lobster boil, I have not researched potential solutions to my ethical dilemma.
Here I am, ostracized by the rest of the guests. :-) At least DjingDjang still loves me.
Django and I before our haircuts. Now, we both look idiotic. Who am I kidding? We look idiotic here too.
Salty brine (water, lemons, garlic, paprika, salt and peper, herbs) prepared by Paul
The big dump.
I drank a third of a cup of butter. As disgusting as it sounds, I dipped everything in butter, even sausage.
My brother-in-law and sister-in-law are awesome, generous hosts and they really know how to prepare a feast. Clovermead, Sparta, Port Stanley
I took Clémence and two Spanish girls that my friend was hosting to Clovermead, which is an apiary near Aylmer. There's a shop that offers samples of flavoured honey and an historic "town" that you can tour.
The Spanish students and Clémence, in front of one of the many bee displays
We also visited Sparta, which was a first for me. Sparta is purportedly the candle capital of Canada.
Try to say "candle capital of Canada" five times fast!
The entire town reeks of a scented candle. Of course, we had to visit the main candle shop and I got sucked into buying an infuser that I later gifted to Clémence. Why, you ask? Because:
it stank like the town
C wanted it and offered to buy it from me. There was no way that I was driving back there to suffer another visit to Stinktown
I was feeling generous and wanted to give her a going-away gift.
The girls made me stop the car and take many pictures of them beneath a Sparta town-sign, which they thought was hilarious!
I think they've seen too many Sparta Remix videos on youtube:
THIS IS SPARTA!
A word on Sparta remixes. Do NOT look them up on Youtube unless you enjoy maniacal, anxiety-inducing, hyperspeed technosynth interspersed with King Leonidas screaming THIS IS SPARTA! Here, I've made it easy for you, if you are indeed curious. Don't say I didn't warn you.
As pour moi, the "Spartan" highlights were leaving the sickeningly sweet smelling candle shop and yes! finding a mouldy twenty on someone's front lawn. I treated everyone to ice cream and the shop we visited even had my favourite flavour - coconut!
Port Stanley Little Beach
After P.S., we stopped at Picard's Peanuts for a nut fix. Well I wanted a nut fix, I am uncertain whether anyone else actually craved nuts. I purchased a lot of chocolate covered items (toffee, peanuts, raisins, chips and pretzels). I looked for some chocolate covered olives but I couldn't find any. The chocolate covered carrots were also missing. ;-)
Our last stop was the Jumbo monument in St. Thomas. This reproduction of the giant pachyderm has always appealed to me - it's very kitsch. I can't help but wonder what it must have been like to see the train bear down on poor Jumbo. And the elephant carnage on the tracks! Oi! How did they remove Jumbo's body? There's a story percolating... I think I might have to do some research in the London Room...
The girls adored Jumbo. Not as much as they obsessed over the Sparta sign, but still!
There's more to tell, but I will save that for my next post. In the meantime, here are two of my go-to muffin recipes. I use both of these recipes ALL THE TIME. I am going to vent here for a minute. You know what I hate? People who refuse to share recipes. I used to work with a woman who made lemon squares and she wouldn't give me her recipe and I love lemon squares. So I share. Because that woman really pissed me off. As George Eliot wrote:
"What do we live for, if it is not to make life less difficult for each other?"
Clémence contacted me two days ago on FB and asked me for some of my muffin recipes because she missed them! That made me feel really good. I know my muffins are yummy, but I didn't realize that C actually enjoyed them. I mean, she ate them and all, but I thought it was for sustenance more than pleasure. I have tweaked the recipes A LOT, and I can assure you that they are delicious and more nutritious than anything you will buy at the grocery store. I usually make double batches, giving some muffins to my neighbours, keeping a dozen out on the counter and freezing the rest for lunchboxes.
I am assuming that most of you have a basic understanding of baking, so you will already know that you first mix the dry ingredients in one bowl, then mix up the remaining ingredients (wet) in a different bowl, and then combine the two. Mix them together just until the flour disappears. Don't over-mix or you will have tough muff. From the Joy of Baking:
Mixing too much overdevelops the gluten in the flour which will cause a tough muffin with tunnels and a compact texture. Only 10 to 15 strokes are needed to moisten the ingredients. The batter should be still (sic) lumpy and you may still see a few traces of flour.
A note on butter versus oil. You will see that both of these recipes call for vegetable or canola oil. I am pro-butter myself, but I have found that these two recipes have a better result with the oil -- the muffins are more moist. And I am all about moist. Hockey pucks masquerading as muffins will be rejected by this baker's maw.
Sorry for the chickenscratch below. I actually tried to write neatly! I was going to take pictures of my recipe cards but they look disgusting (big greasy stains all over them) and make no sense to anyone but me.
You can use any combo of white and whole wheat flours, brown or white sugar and I often omit the salt. To make cream cheese frosting, just dump some cc in a bowl, add icing sugar and milk or cream to thin it. You can also add some vanilla extract. Don't buy the fake vanilla extract. Buy the real stuff.
You don't have to use an electric mixer. I usually just use a wooden spoon, because I don't like doing dishes.
Sept 11, 2013 - I just made the double chocolate zucchini today. They ROCK! #####################
A little more than a year ago, I got suckered into giving someone my contact information in exchange for this:
Yes friends, I gave out my personal info for a lipstick. I come cheap, I guess; pathetic, I know. And the lipstick was a horrible orange colour that did not suit my skintone. Damn my swag-loving self.
Several weeks ago, I received a telephone call from Nacel Canada, the very organization that had handed out the free lipstick. They wondered whether I was still interested in participating in the homeschooling program.
Huh?
I was a little taken aback, as I had completely forgotten about the program and the reason I received a crappy lipstick for free; however, I am always up for a challenge (and fodder for my blog!) and so I said that I would do it. July 2013 was too soon (hernia surgery for yours truly) and so I suggested that we would give it the old college try in August. I hung up the phone, not really expecting to hear from them again any time soon.
the manual
Flash-forward a few weeks.
Nacel called again two days ago and this time they seemed somewhat desperate. They had a French student, whom I'll call C, 17 years of age, who had previously been placed with a family of smokers (who only smoked outside, apparently). The young lady's parents did not approve, especially because their daughter has exercise-induced asthma. The smokers were almost immediately rejected by the family and the jeune fille was placed in another home. A week or so later, the new hostess decided that she didn't really want to participate in the program and so the young lady was again homeless. Was there anyway that we could accommodate the student?
Well of course we could!
We received the young lady's profile, which I am NOT going to post publicly (I do have some scruples!). G, the chatty and huggy coordinator, visited us the same day that we spoke on the phone and did a house visit / interview. She asked us a few questions (do you smoke?), inspected the room that was to be the student's, took some pictures of our house, admired our art (she's an art lover too!), and explained the program to us. She was here for about an hour. She thought that we would be fine candidates because we are both home all day - RB's a teacher and I am a SAHM / librarian. She approved us on the spot - to my surprise! - and that was that. I would like to point out that the approval process seems somewhat laissez-faire, which is RIGHT up my alley. G did not ask us for a police check (seriously!). In fact, I brought it up: "What about police checks?"
G was nonfazed: "I administer quite a few of these programs and Nacel is the only one that does not require a police check".
I was nonplussed. In this day and age of the moral majority's complete fear and loathing of strangers (I blame the media), there still exists an international program that does not require participants to have police checks? What is this world coming to, I ask you? RB and I have current police checks as he is a teacher and I am a professional volunteer. We are good people (most of the time, well, excepting my recent interactions with a psychotic neighbour in which I attempted to drive him insane).
Yes, you read it right. NO POLICE CHECKS NEEDED. I personally don't feel that it's a big deal, in fact I kind of like it; however, I do find it to be strange. I would NEVER send a 17-year old Gwen to a strange family's home without a proper background check. Well, I say that now, but is she only 7 and still very much my baby. Call me hypervigilant when it comes to my own children, but a total hippie otherwise.
Here's a brief summary of the program:
C arrives. We speak English only. NO FRENCH! As if. I am totally going to speak a little bit of Franglais just to make C laugh
C hangs with us every hour of every day. Yes, this part is true. Nacel's curfew is 7pm if C is out in the evening without us (begs to be broken!). Also funny, Nacel does not want the students mixing with others in the program. More on that later.
There is a homeschooling program, but it seems very loosey-goosey. The point of the program is to "offer students an opportunity to learn English in a family setting... improving language skills and Canadian cultural understanding". Basically, there is a lot of chatting involved and you all know that I love to chitchat. Sample lessons include playing 20 questions (as a family, we are obsessed with this game) and giving each other compliments: Why Christine, that shade of lipstick is so becoming on you.
We have a one page "check-in chart" to fill out to prove that we have done some homeschoolin': "PLEASE NOTE: 'CHECK-IN CHART' IS YOUR ONLY PROOF OF DELIVERY OF PROGRAM, BY YOU TO STUDENT". Awesome, this program rocks! I love it already. Check this out. Looks tough, dudnit?
This is my kind of form!
Last night, we received an email from C, asking us for a family photo. Why yes, I would be happy to send you our picture. This is what I sent:
...........................................
........................
............................... wait for it...
................
.........................
.................
How funny is that? Yes, I am a sick individual.
In my defence, I only made her suffer for about 5 minutes and then I sent her not one, but two photos of us, in which we look moderately appealing:
Lord Roberts Funfair photo booth
Christmas 2012 - fancy schmancy!
And so it's 8am-ish on Wednesday and we are awaiting C's arrival (tomorrow evening at 11-ish at the Costco parking lot). I will post again in a week or so.
Update
It's Thursday at 11:51pm. We were supposed to have picked up C at 11pm. There's been a three hour delay, dammit. The plane has been delayed and it sucks. RB is sleeping and I'm burning the midnight oil by reading Shogun. Someone was just boiled alive in a pot of water. Why do I do this to myself? Why why why?
Clémence arrived at 2:35am. She was as happy, friendly and smiley as someone who has spent the entire day traveling can be.
